Who Thinks Up This Stuff?

 First: A Disclaimer – I have to admit, I’m a bit jaded when it comes to Hallmark cards; I find them to be VERY over-priced and I  have become maybe even a little cynical and think that Hallmark is in “cahoots” with some calendar folks who proclaim that some random day is now “Kiss Your Neighbor Day” and, lo and behold, here is a $4.25 card to celebrate that wonderful occasion! I also have come to find great satisfaction in creating my own greeting cards rather then shell out $4+ for a mass produced card (although, a bit of a confession here; I have been known to :::gasp::: “lift” a sentiment or two from a Hallmark card to use in my own creations…but at least I buy the first card; it’s not as if I stand there in the store with my note pad jotting down heartfelt sentiments)…anyway, I digress.

Second: The Point – Disclaimer, above, aside; I absolutely LOVE the humor that comes in the form of the Shoebox line of greeting cards from Hallmark! I mean, who thinks up this stuff? Are these the same folks that write for SNL? Someone has peeked into the quirkiest side of my brain and lifted out the silliest of thoughts and put it on a card! I have been known to absolutely, positively LAUGH OUT LOUD to the point of practically crying over some of these cards! The most recent one I purchased, I carried up to the cashier, tears running down my face, “Have you SEEN this card? Oh my God! This is the most hysterical card I have ever read!” To which, Hallmark Lady smiles and, in an annoyingly placating tone,  asks for my “Gold Crown Card.”

Anyway, Hallmark Lady is obviously not “quirky” and does not nurture and cultivate that part of her brain. I, on the other hand, LOVE quirky! I LOVE people who are quirky! Quirky humor is the kind that makes you giggle, giggle a little louder and then just flat out guffaw and maybe even “laugh until the tears run down your leg” (as a friend of mine says)! I have often wished I possessed a spontaneous sense of humor, I don’t, I’m just not quick enough, I’m an accountant for God’s sake; but man oh mighty, can I appreciate those who do possess this gift; especially the quirky style. Some of my best friends are the quirkiest (and you know who you are). And, fortunately, I have been able to pass the appreciation for quirky on to at least one of my offspring. I know, when I come home with one of these cards, at least ONE member of my family will roll around on the floor while I am rolling on the couch in gales of laugher. “Oh My God! Is This Not The Funniest Card You Ever Saw?”

So, I’m thinking of stock-piling a few of these…actually keeping them for myself to just roll out on the days that I need a good dose of quirky; a day when I could use a flat out “guffaw.”

Oh, and the card that inspired this little rant of mine?

And the punch line? No, it has nothing to do with “getting screwed.”

Are you ready? Are you sure? Do you need to use the potty first? Here goes..

 Clamp your hams? CLAMP YOUR HAMS? Who thinks this up? I’m dying…. (Oh, and I gave this card to my dear husband who just celebrated a birthday recently and, for the purposes of public consumption on the blog, I used a little “mask” to hide my sultry message that I had written to him under the sentiment).

Anyway, I hope you’re happy! I hope you know it! And, when you do? Well…you know what to do!

…on the floor, rolling around, in gales of laughter…Fannie

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3 Responses to Who Thinks Up This Stuff?

  1. Fae says:

    OMG! Now I’ll have that stupid song in my head all day long! Thanks.

  2. Larelle says:

    I’m not rolling on the ground with laughter, but I have to admit to lots of giggles. Mostly, I love your sense of humor. Thank you for my laugh of the day.

  3. J king says:

    When I first opened this card, I dropped to the floor in hysterical laughter. The other folks in the CVS drugstore watched with curiosity. Tears were streaming down my face. I’m glad someone else think’s it’s hiilarious; I was a bit concerned about my mental well-beingf.

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